Archive for San Francisco Giants

What Floozie Gave the Giants Our Number?

Posted in Astros rivals, Houston Astros with tags , , , , , , , , , , , on April 7, 2010 by Astropolithecus

I don’t remember ever wanting a date with Bochy.

Still, someone gave the damn San Fran hippies our number, and they have steamed rolled since we opened Enronit Maid Park.

One four game sweep in 2008 against them does not make up for the brutal beat down they constantly unleash on our unimpressive  band of sandlotters.

Ringing doubles at perfect times, Koufax like pitching performances, and broken bat grand slams rule the day for these punks.

In fact, not only do we give them our number, but they treat us like loose women, slamming us all week, and then abruptly blowing town.

And, you better believe it, they can’t wait to come to town next year.

They are the only team the Astros play whom I would GLADLY play six games against in their own park.

I hope I have conveyed the dread I feel when ever I hear the Giants are rolling into town.  I knew this season would start with a dead thud.

But Astros fans, don’t transfer that dread to the rest of the season JUST yet.  Yes, we looked like a bunch of losers this week, and I don’t know if I’ve ever seen Carlos, Matsui, and Pence look worse in a series. We were also making all the same damn mistakes we made all last season, to an amazing degree of specificity, and that’s scary. Granted, I’m as  terrified as you we’ll give the Nationals a run for their money in futility, but don’t give up yet fair Astros fans. You deserve better, and I have this weird feeling the Astros might indulge us in some hot playing this year. I absolutely mean it. And before you laugh me off, remember I called Duke over Butler on two of my four NCAA brackets this season. I do have a modicum of gypsy blood.

What I’m saying is, give the guys, and these are mostly good, hard players, a chance to warm up first.

At least they got the annual slaughtering by the Giants over with right away this season.

Just next time they come to town, let’s make them buy us dinner first.


Reunited And It Feels So Good

Posted in Houston Astros with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on August 12, 2008 by beckeesh

With last night’s win over the San Francisco Giants, the Astros reached the .500 mark for the first time since June 11.  Here’s a look back at the road from and to .500.


First of all, on June 11, we actually lost our game to Milwaukee.  We had been doing a lot of losing.  Although the month of May was in large part a fun one, with the ‘Stros winning seventeen out of twenty-eight games (for an overall wining percentage of .607), they lost four in a row at the end of May and began June by winning only three out of their first seven games (through June 10th).  On June 11, we were either going to stay above .500 or drop to just .500.  We did the latter, and went on to lose the next seven games in a row.  In June, we won only ten out of twenty-five (for a winning percentage of .400).  Yikes!

July was also a tough month to be a ‘Stros fan.  We kicked it off by losing four straight, and won only ten out of twenty-four games total.  July would also be the first month of Lance Berkman’s career in which he did not hit a homerun.

This August, we are trending up.  Having won nine of eleven to begin the month we are finally back to .500 ball.

Here’s a list of ‘Stros-related events that have occurred since the last time we were respectable:

6/11 Astros lose to Milwaukee, drop to .500.

6/12 – 6/19 Astros lose seven in a row, ending with a sweep by the Baltimore Orioles, and our winning percentage drops to .452

6/22 Shawn Chacon is moved to the bullpen.

6/24 Kaz Matsui strains hammy, is put on the 15-day DL.

6/25 Ed Wade confronts Shawn Chacon, Shawn Chacon throws Ed Wade to the ground, Shawn Chacon suspended, later released (here, here, here… and opinion here, here…)

7/1 Humberto Quintero is hit on the head  by Dodger Luis Maza’s bat, diagnosed with a concussion, and placed on the 15-day DL.

7/6 MLB All-Star rosters  are announced.  Lance Berkman and Miguel Tejada are voted onto the NL team.  Carlos Lee is on the ballot for the final fan vote. 

7/8 The Astros make an All-Star fan vote campaign video for Carlos.  (If you have never seen this, you should check it out!)

7/10 Oscar Villarreal  is designated for assignment, eventually released.  Matsui returns from the DL.

7/15 MLB All-Star game.  (Carlos Lee did not make the team.)

7/19 Roy Oswalt is placed on 15-day DL (left hip adductor).

7/21 Humberto Quintero returns from the DL.

7/23 Astros acquire Randy Wolf  from San Diego. 

7/28 Roy Oswalt returns from the DL, starts, defeats Reds.

7/31 Astros acquire LaTroy Hawkins  from the Yankees.

8/4  We all almost die in a tornado / lightning storm in Chicago, but survive to get the win.

8/11 Astros defeat Giants, return to .500!